Intention

We live in a culture that constantly clamors for more, more, more.

More money, more things, more information. We need the newest, the best, the most. We just have to beat the Jones’. We *need* the fastest phone, best tv, most popular shoes.

Something I realized a few years ago, and keep realizing over and over – none of it actually makes us happy. None of it actually satisfies. In fact, the opposite is more often true.

Stuff stresses us out.

But what do we do about it? We keep on collecting more. We trudge onward, wading through the things we collect to try to make ourselves happy.

So what’s the alternative?

I’m glad you asked.

Minimalism.

Maybe this brings to mind the idea of a bare room with just a few pieces of furniture, a closet rack with three shirts, two pairs of pants, and one pair of shoes underneath.

Depriving yourself of physical things, to focus on what’s most important.

Half of that last sentence is correct. The second half. Minimalism is about focusing on what is most important, but it’s not about depriving yourself of possessions.

That bare room I mentioned might be someone’s version of minimalism, sure, but here’s where we get to the beautiful heart of why I love minimalism. It’s not about depriving yourself of all the things you love. It’s about only having the things you love. It’s about intentionally deciding to not have piles of stuff between you and what and who you love. It’s intentionally choosing what you want to be in your life, and eliminating what matters less. It’s about leaving the stress from stuff behind us, and focusing on what’s important. So it’s not about have less than the Jones’ either. It’s about having things that add value to your life, and letting go of the things that don’t. A thought that has never failed to help me get rid of something that I’m struggling to let go of is: that if I’m debating over it, it’s not bringing that much value to my life – so there’s probably someone out there who would get a lot more value from it. Minimalism isn’t about not having things. It’s about having the things that make your life better, and not holding on to what doesn’t.

I don’t think anyone does this perfectly. Life complicates things; you’re given something or buy something that ends up just sitting on a shelf and not being used. Things end up in your life that don’t enrich it. I’m on what I call my minimalism “journey.” My apartment is not perfectly minimalist. It takes time to pare down to what is most important. It’s a constant process. Someday I will get to a place that I’m happy with. It probably won’t be the same as someone else’s exact definition of minimalism for them. But the thing is, our lives are all different. We are all different people. Different things are needed for different lives. Different things are important to different people. My camera is one of my most prized possessions. My husband appreciates that my camera is that important to me, but he has different things that matter to him. And I know that even when I’m in a place that I’m happy with, it will still be a process. Noticing a shirt that I used to wear but don’t anymore. Realizing that I don’t need that kitchen utensil.

For me it comes down to having a healthy relationship with stuff.

I used to cling to my possessions like they defined me. I’ve learned that isn’t true at all. Actually, when I have the freedom to let go of things, it helps me to have the space to see who I am as I change with the years, rather than holding on to who I used to be. I think it’s okay to hold onto some special mementos – I have my grandpa’s bible, a drawing of my husband and I given to us on our wedding day. It’s okay to look back, but you shouldn’t be trying to stay in the past by holding onto everything you’ve owned. Keep things to remind you of happy times, but don’t keep things that once brought value to you and don’t now simply because you once needed or loved them. That is only an unwillingness to change – and life is constant change and growth. I’m not the same person I was a year ago, and neither are you.

I also don’t feel a need to constantly have the newest and best anymore.

Not to say that I don’t want nice things, but I also don’t feel the need to have the newest and best cell phone or tv or car, because they aren’t that important to me. They don’t enrich my life.

Something I will spend some more money on would be a newer camera, a nice planner, or a piece of clothing that fits me just right, because they do enrich my life.

Intention, not deprivation. That’s what minimalism is about.